Top Ten Topics for Discussion in the New Mandatory White House Ethics Briefings

Washington, DC - Rep. Louise M. Slaughter (D-NY-28), Ranking Member of the House Rules Committee, today released a secret internal White House memo, ironically leaked to a staffer in her office. The document illustrated the major lessons taught and topics covered in a new series of mandatory ethics briefings being given to all Administration employees. The top ten are listed below:

10. Outing CIA agents is fun - but is it legal?

9. The Art of Political Revenge: When, Why, and How.

8. Turning impeachable offenses into minor technicalities - It's easier than you think.

7. It doesn't matter what the other Republican kids say, getting indicted isn't cool.

6. No matter what you do, you can always count on Ann Coulter for support.

5. In case of emergency, break glass and steal Constitution.

4. Required Reading: "Ethics Schmethics - My American Dream" by Tom DeLay.

3. The best way to get a second date with Patrick Fitzgerald is to lie to the grand jury.

2. Richard Nixon: Ethics Pioneer or Pioneering Ethicist?

1. Consult your lawyer immediately if you receive a golf invitation from Jack Abramoff.